Sunday, September 2, 2012

Clinton's Thoughts on Our Marriage

What leisure activities do you share with your spouse and family? 
I probably enjoy traveling the most. I always hate the getting there part (the long drives, sitting in a cramped plane), but I always enjoy myself once we get wherever we're going. I would love to be able to take a big group of my family to Europe!
Danielle and I also enjoy exercising together. We have an exercise bike and a weight set at our house, so we usually exercise at the same time. We keep each other motivated!

How do you express love and affection? 
Danielle would be the first person to say that I like to bug the people that I love most! Nothing mean, of course, just like to mildly pester and be around them.
But, usually, I just enjoy sitting and talking with the people I love the most. Danielle and I are often the people that sit in the Subway or the McDonald's way too long as we chat about work, school, or family.

What are the strengths and challenges of your marriage? 
I would say that our strengths are that we're still each other's best friend. We enjoy being around each other and spending time together. I've seen many couples spend most of their time fighting when they're together, but I'm happy to say that we're one of the few couples that I know that spends a lot of time together and can still resolve our differences in a very upbeat way.
The biggest challenge to our marriage has been our inability to have kids. When we were first married, it didn't take Danielle long to want to start our family. I didn't feel quite ready at the time; I instead wanted to begin my schooling. Over time as we began trying to have children, it became more and more of a difficulty for us to talk about children. Danielle was desperate to have kids, while I was a lot more relaxed about the idea. It created some tension between Danielle and her sisters as her sisters seemed able to have children within a few weeks or trying, while we were not able to. The experience caused Danielle to emotionally separate herself not only from her family, but also from me somewhat. However, now that I've started to feel the desire to start our family, I think this has become something that has brought us together more than it has pulled us apart.

How do you resolve disagreements? What do you do? What does your spouse do? 
Typically when Danielle and I disagree, I'm the type that makes my point while still trying to remain upbeat. In fact, I remember once that I told Danielle that we couldn't argue unless we were able to smile doing it! Eventually, we were able to see that some of our arguments seemed a bit petty, but it also made us see that we don't need to be angry or condescending to make our point known. Now, we each make our point, listen to the other's viewpoint, and come to a compromise. There are times, however, when neither of us can agree (something that occurred a couple of weeks ago), and at that point, we simply agree to drop the issue and to try to act normal again. Usually, this works!

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